This. Is. Us.

This. Is. Us.
Day One - 12/21/17 


Placement Day {the day we met the girls} was full of every emotion you could imagine....times TWO! We had two different meetings, two different places, two different times, with two different babies (What in the world?!?!) I was still wrapping my head around the fact that God blessed us with two baby girls! And TODAY we were meeting them! TODAY they were ours?!?! TODAY our waiting was over!?!?! 

Since Kinley had already been discharged out of the NICU, we went to the agency to meet her first {of course, after spending another hour signing more papers ✒️📄}. As our social worker went to get her, my heart raced. Like pounded in my chest, i just ran a marathon, I think I'm going to faint, race! I was about to meet my daughter. Our daughter. ONE of our TWO daughters! 4 years of waiting for this moment raced through my head.  But those 4 years of trying and waiting, the pain, the excitement of pregnancies, the losses, the stabbing heartache of birth announcements, the longing, the cursing, the wondering "why not me", all made since when they placed that sweet, tiny girl in my arms. This was why. She was why. God knew why ALL ALONG. Kinley was why! 



(I mean, look how tiny she is in that big ole' seat!) 

After many tears were shed, and a million questions were asked (because, what on earth do we do now?) we hopped in the car and drove an hour to meet sister! Hayden was getting discharged out of the NICU Friday so we headed to the hospital where they were born. We were blessed enough to get to stay the night Thursday in the hospital with both girls and go home as a family of 4 on Friday!  To many, staying in the hospital wouldn’t seem like a blessing, but if you’ve ever imagined having a baby, that’s typically a piece that you envision. You imagine the visitors, the advice, the assistance  (because still in my mind, what do we do now?), the whole experience. As a woman, I had come to terms that that wouldn’t be our experience since we were adopting, but our gracious God had other plans. As we arrived to the hospital, we were greeted with a mob of NICU nurses, all thrilled to see Kinley, and meet their forever family!  Side Note: if you’ve ever experienced the NICU, you know how all sorts of amazing those nurses are! I am SO THANKFUL to have gotten to meet the wonderful ladies who loved on, cared for, and prayed over our sweet baby girls before we could! Anyways, so after we chatted with them a bit and they showed us to our room, we were off to meet Hayden! Again, the flood of emotions came back like a fierce wave.  As I walked in the NICU and saw my precious girl hooked up to all those monitors, I couldn’t help but praise God for his goodness! Although she was hooked up, she looked healthy and happy. I knew she had been cared for and was now thriving. The nurse handed her to me and I was able to sit and rock her, in the quietness only pierced by the beeps of machines, and I again realized, this is all why. Hayden was why too!  This is our purpose. Since Hayden had been doing so well, they wanted to take her off the machines and have her sleep with us in the room overnight to see how she did. They got her all unhooked and sent us to our room to meet Dad {he was still with Kinley} and see sister again! 



Walking in that room, our family was complete. The 4 of us were all together. Our daughters were back together. My heart was put back together. And from that moment on, I couldn’t imagine life any other way. 





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